So, I have a graduate. I mean, I actually had to ask my son if he was finished with high school. A bit anticlimactic, to say the least.
Me: So, are you completely finished?
Him: Yeah, I am done.
Me: Well, that was not how I pictured it.
And so he is finished high school just like that. He will walk the graduation ceremony in July and mark the occasion. Still, I wonder how all of these students, both high school and college graduates, would have been different if they had the opportunity to close out the year properly. Although most of the students I have talked to don’t seem to be too affected by the change in plans, it is a loss. It is a time that we did not see coming and could have never predicted and certainly could not have prepared for it. Typically there would be a list of events marking the end of a long thirteen years of learning and growing. There would be Prom and exams, projects, and celebrations and making plans to hang out one more time as seniors. But that did not happen. As with many things in life, it doesn’t always go the way you expect it to or how you hoped it would.
When we are unable to prepare for significant life changes that come our way, it brings an extra sense of loss. We might have known it was coming, but since it was much different than predicted, the closure we needed never happened, and it might take a little bit of grief to make it past the hurdle. It kind of makes you think about how you would do things differently if you knew it was your last time walking out that door or attending that class or cheering on that team. And I think we all have had experiences that bring us back to that feeling.
Having a little patience with yourself and your loved ones during this time might be in order. Remembering that although they may seem to be taking it in stride, they may still be having a little anxiety or feel a bit of a letdown. There is so much change throughout our lives, and also so much that is unpredictable. Make peace with it and know that we are all just doing the best we can. Congratulations to those who have graduated. And congratulations to the parents who helped guide them through it. It is not always an easy road, but watching our babies succeed is such a gift.
“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can” – Arthur Ashe
May the best years be ahead!